A modest proposal for amendments to teacher recruitment and advertising:
Join our team of criminally incompetent child abusers. Help us psychologically and physically main helpless defenseless children. If you are a pathological monster who enjoys inflicting horror and suffering on innocent youth, we‘ve got a place for you! We’ll even pay you top salary.
Yes, it is illegal, but nobody cares. We’ll provide unconditional institutional support for your psychotic sadism and never hold you accountable. Join our crazy fun. You can abuse students every day and make them thank you for your cruelty and incompetence! How cool is that?
Help us create the next generation of emotionally and intellectual crippled young people. Just look at our platoon of helpful foreign teachers who tell anyone who questions our deviant ethics and criminally perverted assaults on defenseless kids:
“Quit!”, “Leave!” ,“Go back to your own country!”, “Your efforts put me to sleep!”, “Give up!”, “You’ll never change anything!”.
See? This is a true wonderland for child abusers. We’ve got all your bases covered. Never mind about bothersome trivialities like student’s test scores or academic achievement. We don’t want teachers, we want torturers. After all, they aren’t people, they’re just annoying monkeys, idiotic punching bags. You can hit them with rulers and sticks all day long! Leave permanent scars. Wound and crush their little souls! Watch the tears and laugh! Look at how many teachers do this while nobody cares! Nobody does anything! Sweet!
Sure we make acceptable noise when the papers and cameras show up, but in reality we could care less about dumb test scores and ridiculous foreign ideas like teacher accountability or academic excellence. What we want are mentally destroyed human zombies. Drones who will work without unions in our foreign-owned factories. Morons who will follow all orders unquestioningly. Zoned out mannequins who will swim in corruption and deviance without a complaint. PTSD twits who will dive headfirst into a meat grinder when told. And jacked up sociopaths who will even shoot their fellow countrymen dead in the street when we command them to do so. So come on, join us in the paradise of immunity where the party of criminal abuse never ends!